Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Off with her head!

I am simply crestfallen. I have just learned of Tim Burton’s nascent literary decreation: Alice in Wonderland. He has cast some twenty-year-old waif as Alice, as well as his stock duumvirate of Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter. High hopes I have none. Tim Burton’s ‘vision’ has been cockeyed and substandard for years.

Jesus, whatever happened to all those baseball cap-wearing, Coke swilling screenwriters?

Some other planned
Hollywood befoulements I’m not eagerly anticipating are:

Maurice Sendak’s Where the Wild Things Are
Adiga’s The White Tiger
Nick McDonnell’s Twelve
Douglas Coupland’s Girlfriend in a Coma
Fitzgerald’s The Great Gatsby
Salman Rushdie’s Midnight’s Children
Yann Martel’s The Life of Pi
Colette’s Cheri

Oh, how I wish I could shut up like a telescope! I think I could, if I only knew how to begin.


  1. Tim Burton reportedly suffers from Asperger's Syndrome hence his repetitiveness of both actors and style. No you don't have a baseball capped coke swilling screen-writer there. You have someone who has high-functioning autism who can only write with the one theme. Oh well!

    Do what I do and don't bother with any contemporary remakes, otherwise you will end up in tears. Most remakes crucify the original or annihilate literature.

  2. Helena Bonham Carter's resume must read 'seeking jobs with big petticoats only'.

  3. *we're all mad here* but I did enjoy 'Sweeney Todd'. Ilove musicals and I love bloody violence and the two don't often meet. I probably will see Burton's 'Alice' - possibly under the influence of a slice of mushroom.

  4. I've really wanted to read White Tiger, what's it like? Is it as good as it's hype?

    I'm personally looking forward to 2081- a movie version of Harrison Bergeron- a short story.